It Doesn’t Get Easier, You Get Better

It’s gonna be Not Fun. You’re going to think things like, “Wow, I’m an uncoordinated potato person who clearly has existed thus far based on luck alone,” or, “I am a shame to my ancestors,” and “Can I die now please?”

It’s okay, really.  Beginning a new physical skill and fitness regimen, ESPECIALLY when you are in poor shape, is really, really hard.

And guess what? It doesn’t get easier, exactly. You get tougher, you get smarter, you become stronger, and hard work becomes a habit that doesn’t threaten you as much.

When you’re weak, it’s easy to feel the exertion and the pain and the effort and think “this sucks, I’m done,” because you would rather opt out of the difficult task than face uncomfortable truths about yourself that, maybe, threaten your ideas of who you are. It’s not fun or sexy or badass to feel your own weakness. But it is a crucial part of any kind of growth process.

It’s a mistake to look at someone who is at the pinnacle of their sport and think “Wow, it’s so easy for them, they’re so good at it…they must be gifted.” It is SO easy to look at someone strong and skilled and dismiss them as “gifted,” because it protects your ego and excuses you from taking responsibility for your fitness/skill/etc.

They might be more genetically presupposed to be good at that particular thing, and yes, everyone has different skills or abilities that they are more likely to be good at, but to be REALLY good at something, no matter what it is, you have to work really diligently and intensely. This takes incredible focus.  And it’s REALLY, hard.

Photo Scott Lloyd Photography

Cultivating a physical (or non physical) discipline that routinely challenges you is hard, but that is what makes it so empowering when you progress. You confront limiting ideas of yourself, you deconstruct your ego, and you grow.

It doesn’t get easier — but you adapt, and become stronger, tougher, more informed about yourself and more capable of meeting new challenges.

I remember the beginning, it was rough.

And it’s still rough, a lot of the time. But now I expect that, and I know how  much better it can make me because I have the proof of my body, my skills, and most importantly, my attitude.

Cara

Spring Update: Strongwoman Competition, Blogs, and What’s Next

My spring has already been pretty packed; I’m sure many of you can relate.

I competed three times in April. It was bananas. I hit a bunch of personal bests, and got my qualification for Strongman Corporation Nationals this upcoming fall in Las Vegas, so that’s pretty cool.

"I sing the body electric, The armies of those I love engirth me and I engirth them, They will not let me off till I go with them, respond to them, And discorrupt them, and charge them full with the charge of the soul.  2. Was it doubted that those who corrupt their own bodies conceal themselves? And if those who defile the living are as bad as they who defile the dead? And if the body does not do fully as much as the soul? And if the body were not the soul, what is the soul?" -#waltwhitman ++++++++ Photo by @slpfitnessphotography, one of my favorite shots from last weekend. #isingthebodyelectric #strongwoman #strongman #womenwholift #midatlanticstrongmanchallenge #EuropaGames #strongmancorporation #bodyandsoul #ironmind #sacredbody #sacredlife #strengthculture #healthyliving #heavylifting #loveyourself #neckveinonpoint #makesavagethebody #girlswhostrongman #trainstrongman #hypetrain #mondaymotivation #monday

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Since the shut down of my old gym, I’ve been settling into a very wonderful private fitness studio in Chelsea, NYC, and finding a new groove as a totally independent businesswoman. That is also pretty cool. I am also now offering online coaching for remote clients with strength, fitness and fat loss goals.

Meanwhile, I’ve been dedicating more time to writing (about both fitness and Strongman, as well as some creative film projects), and you can read some of my recent pieces at these links (you can also click on the BarBend link on the header bar), as well as here on my main blog (just scroll down after this post).

Hey, Athletes! Stop Apologizing For Selfies

Why Women (and Men) Should Use Deadlifting Straps

Now that my competition slate is cleared until the fall, I can spend some long, leisurely but focused training cycles on getting stronger, more conditioned, and more knowledgeable about what my body needs to continue to expand its potential (ie, don’t compete 3 times in one month). I am very excited for my competition future, but mostly just excited to get back in the gym and train after some restful time off.

I was honored to get to coach my trainee Mel through her second USAPL meet recently as well; and I had a blast doing it. It was hosted by the South Brooklyn Weightlifting Club, and was a fun and well-run event.

Stay tuned for more content, and in the meantime, check out some of these other fitness and training blogs written by some very smart humans!

That Grey Area – Fail A Lot

Belle of the Bar -Meet the Women of ‘America’s Strongest Adaptive Athlete’

SayerFit – Space Station Dilemma

Precision Nutrition – Forget Calorie Counting

Renaissance Periodization – Triceps Hypertrophy Training Tips

JenSinkler.com – Kourtney Thomas – How Hypertrophy Supports Strength Goals

Oh one more thing – I got to meet Bill Kazmaier!

-Cara

HEADER IMAGE  COURTESY OF SCOTT LLOYD FITNESS PHOTOGRAPHY

The Beginner’s Gauntlet: You Don’t Hate Working Out, You Hate Being Out of Shape

Chest pains. Nausea. Body shakes. You dread working out, because this is what it means to you. Total exhaustion and PAIN. 

You avoid working out, because working out means pain. UNBEARABLE pain.

But this isn’t what working feels like. That’s what being out of shape feels like.

Don’t get me wrong, an effective workout should often be challenging and uncomfortable, but once you are in good shape, those challenges FEEL different. Your body, now accustomed to hard work, relishes the opportunity to push. A hard workout, while still painful at times, is not excruciating.

I swear I recently read a blog or a Facebook post that quipped something like “You don’t hate exercise, you hate being out of shape.” If I did read that, I cannot for the life of me remember where, so if you’re reading this and you know who wrote that, please message me so I may properly credit them for inspiring THIS post. Moving on.

When you are out of shape – that is, have low aerobic endurance and are generally weak, your body almost perceives physical effort as a terrible threat.

Exercise hurts and is totally overwhelming.

It kinda feels like you’re dying.

That’s not normal. But is is normal if you are out of shape and have just started exercise. It’s not very encouraging, is it?

Let’s call this the Beginner’s Gauntlet. And the Beginner’s Gauntlet comes with more than just with physical pain.

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Baby lifter Cara. About to attempt 225 for the first time, a little over 3 years ago. Also, not that long ago.

A decently able bodied adult without injuries or significantly limiting physical handicaps should be able to get their heart rate up, plank, row, deadlift around their own body weight, and pick up and carry at least half their body weight in each hand. You should be able to balance on one foot for 10 seconds (according to His Excellence, Dan John). You should be able to perform body weight squats. You should be able to exercise relatively uninterrupted for at least 20 minutes.

These are not super high standards either – and if it sounds like they are, then I think you know what you need to do.

But how do you get past the  Beginner’s Gauntlet?

Well, the first thing is acceptance. Accept that it’s GOING to suck a little bit, especially at first.

Realize that you are up to it. A few weeks or months of physical discomfort is not going to kill you.

Realize that it WILL END. This part is important – when we first start exercising, and we are in this  Beginner’s Gauntlet still, we think Oh god, it’s always gonna like this. This SUCKS. Why do people do this? NOT WORTH IT.
And then we quit. And we continue to feel like shit. And nothing changes.

I have a friend who recently has started training under my guidance, and we recently discussed some of the potential negatives that discourage beginners early on in the training process, and one thing stuck out to me:

The idea that you should already be good at it and you clearly just aren’t cut out for hard physical work. This is wrong. Our body are living adaptations at work and we actually crave physical challenge. If we didn’t, strength training wouldn’t work. We just have to stick with exercise long enough to remind it that this is a good thing.

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This took a lot of practice and I ended up going the barbell route versus the yoga route or the calisthenics route. BUT THERE ARE MANY ROUTES!

But again, the  Beginner’s Gauntlet is REALLY hard to get through, especially when combined with any number of mental barriers blocking you from working out (low body confidence, exercise knowledge anxiety, fear of being mocked at the gym, and on and on).  I am no psychologist, so I won’t try to pinpoint what exactly makes it difficult aside from the physical “It feels like shit a lot,” but I will give examples from my own experience.

My attitude towards exercise is often reflective of my attitude toward my ability to overcome obstacles, AND the level of respect I have for my body.

When I don’t think I am capable or strong, I start to fail, I start to give up.  When I feel self-loathing and don’t treat myself with respect and love, I start to abuse my body through neglect. “I hate my body, I’m too weak” — this is a horrible kind of internal warfare, sadly likely familiar to many.

Sometimes, sometimes that attitude can get you in the door to the gym…but it won’t keep you there. SO what is the antidote to hate, even hate for oneself? Here it comes, and you know it’s cheesy AND true;

Self. Fucking. LOVE.

And that can be fucking hard to muster. Sometimes it’s not there at all. This doesn’t make you a failure, it just means you’re a human being and you contain multitudes of highs and lows. Sometimes that love for yourself can be manifested as love for other people. If you don’t feel that love for yourself, maybe it can sound like “I want to be healthy and capable for my partner who loves me,” or “My community that needs me,” — you get the idea.

Love for yourself will keep you in the gym. Love will also give you the courage to fail, which you’re going to need, because you are going to fail, a lot. And that IS A GOOD THING. Because then you will realize that failure really doesn’t kill you – failure is an opportunity to get better.

In the gym, failure is an absolute necessity. In fact, I would say that the gym is one place where failure is IMPERATIVE. if you’re not failing or feeling like you are at some point,  you’re wasting your time.

How long does the  Beginner’s Gauntlet last? Well, it depends on how frequently you commit to exercising and how challenging that exercise. is, and how out of shape you are. There are tons of variables.

But it WILL END. And one day it you’ll wake up, go to the gym, and realize mid workout that you didn’t have to talk yourself into going. You went because you wanted to. You’re a little out of breath, but now you enjoy it. You take pride in it.

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This took some doin’. Also growing out bleached hair is almost as hard as getting in shape.

Listen, not everything in this blog will apply to every beginner. But everything in this blog DID apply to me, and if I felt these things, other people did too.

The  Beginner’s Gauntlet is tough. But one thing is certain – if you keep at it, you WILL get through it, you WILL get better, and you might just even learn to love exercise. You might just learn that it’s one of your favorite things. I know, I was shocked too.

Cara